Dumbass of the Day
(dis)Honorable Mention!
DUDE: If the ATM eats your debit card, just let it go.
Going to jail isn’t going to bring your card back.
Courtesy of Nashua Police
Let’s go to Nashua, New Hampshire - a town SO small, the local paper actually printed our hero's address.
Apparently, 44-year-old John Ouillette wasn’t too happy when his bank’s ATM swallowed his debit card…so he went after it.
Rather than call the bank in the morning - like I did when MY bank's ATM swallowed my debit card at 3:30am - Ouillette tried to rip apart the machine to get to his card, causing $11,000 in damage.
Uh, that’s called felony vandalism…and now he’s facing seven years in prison, where's there's a substantial penalty for early withdrawl.
SEVEN YEARS?? Because the ATM ate your debit card?!
CAREER DAY at CMS!
Yesterday, I appeared at Colton Middle School's Career Day, where I explained to the students how - if they got good grades and stayed out of trouble - they could avoid getting clowned during the Dumbass of the Day!
Among the questions I answered from the students:
What time do I get up in the morning? 2:45am. (That got some gasps)
Have I met Justin Bieber? (No. He WAS supposed to come in one morning, but his mom cancelled the interview after he got bad grades from his tutor. I'm not making this up!)
I then led the students in the singing of, "As Long As You Love Me."
How much money do I make? "More than YOU, kid!"
Who's my favorite rapper of all-time? Tupac!
Can I have Disneyland tickets? Right now? Yes! No. (laughter)
I then proceeded to autograph pieces of paper, school binders, backpacks, shirts, and a couple pairs of shoes . . . and a bunch of cell phones!
But most of the students wanted to pose for pictures, which is ALWAYS cool!
I have to give Nathalie her props, as she was the first one to Tweet about me being at her school. Well done, girl!
Also, thanks to 8th grade science teacher Michael Esquivel (@MisterE9) for inviting me! I had a blast hanging with the kids!
Want me at YOUR school's Career Day? Just do what Upland High, Loma Vista Middle School, Colton Middle School and Grand Terrace High School did - JUST ASK!
