Dumbass of the DAY #1
Hey THUGS: If you don't want to get caught for those bank robberies - and you don't want the police to work overtime to catch you - you might want to cover up those tattoos.
Including the one that says F THE POLICE
Let's go to Orlando, Florida, where the above-pictured guy had fled a halfway house in San Francisco.
Needing cash to support him, his GF and her kid, he apparently robbed a bank.
Unfortunately, he forgot to cover up, as the teller told police about the SF Giants logo tattoo on his neck and the F THE SFPD tattoo across his knuckles.
"Hmmm, " wondered one police officer. "I wonder if this guy is from San Francisco? I wonder if he's accused of any crimes over there?"
OF COURSE the tattoos linked him to a series of bank robberies in San Francisco (AND San Diego), where tellers gave police the same description of the same tattoos, and OF COURSE dude was caught.
Trust me, nothing makes me feel better than an idiot with a GIANTS logo splashed across his neck going to jail!!
DUMBASS of the DAY #2
Ladies: If you find a box of old, discarded VHS porn tapes near your home, just throw 'em away.
Because selling them door-to-door is a recipe for failure!
Courtesy of the Gaffney Police Department. And the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show
Let’s go to Gaffney, South Carolina, where someone dumped a box of old sex tapes near the home of 52-year-old Jeanette Ellis.
Rather than place the box along the curb for garbage pickup - as MOST of us would do if we found some old VHS tapes - Miss Ellis came up with a stupid business plan.
She decided to sell these VHS tapes door-to-door! Gee, what could go wrong?
She conveniently forgot that even in Gaffney, South Carolina, NOBODY watches VHS tapes.
And NOBODY buys their porn from a door-to-door salesperson - ESPECIALLY someone who looks like she came in last at a dog show.
A neighbor called police on Ellis, who was arrested for "operating without a business license."
