DUMBASS of the DAY!

Hey guys, if a PROSTITUTE gives you bad customer service, who should you NOT call with your complaint?

Courtesy of Old Orchard Beach PD

 Let’s go to Old Orchard Beach, Maine, where the above-pictured gentleman had a hired a prostitute - allegedly - and was turned off when she apparently cut their session short by TEN MINUTES!

Yeah, she cut HIM short...

So he reportedly called police to complain that he didn’t get his money’s worth. 

Now, since the police force in Old Orchard Beach, Maine is completely bored, they investigated his complaint – and arrested him and TWO other prostitutes. 

And DURING the investigation, they discovered the guy is listed on national escort databases as a difficult customer!!

D'OH!!  I can't imagine what's more awkward - having your photo published in the local newspaper, so now everyone knows you have to pay for sex . . . or the local newspaper publishing your ADDRESS . . . or the fact prostitutes around the country know you're a douch-nozzle.

 

(dis)Honorable Mention

GUYS: Your GF is going to work, and she put you in charge of her 10-month-old son.

But you wanna go clubbin!!

Who do you get as a last-second babysitter?

A) Your niece

B) Your neighbor

C) Your pit bull

 Courtesy of Palm Beach Cuonty Sheriff's Department

 Let’s go to Palm Coast, Florida where a woman was going to work and left her BF in charge of her 10-month-old son…and she became irate when she returned home from work at the same time he returned from the bar.

So who's watching the baby?

They quickly got into an argument, as she accused him of leaving her son alone – he replied the BABY wasn’t alone because the pit bull was watching him.

No, not THAT Pitbull

Apparently, hiring a pit bull to watch a 10-month-old was a bad idea, because the GF called police, and the BF was arrested.

BTW, when the GF went into the house, the pit bull was obediently sitting in front of a closed bedroom door, and the crying baby was on the other side.

See?  Guys are probably saying, "Everything worked out!  The baby was safe - the pit bull did his job!"

You know, one of the perks of having a pit bull baby sitter is that you don’t have to stock the refrigerator, and pit bull babysitters don’t bitch if you don’t WiFi