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Jeff Pope
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On Air Details
Listen to Jeff Pope on the 991 KGGI Morning Show.
Missed the news?? Look to the right ~
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Contact Jeff Pope
thepopester@hotmail.com |
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Jeff Pope Bio
GREETINGS!! An IE native (Upland HS -'87; Cal State San Bernardino -'92), I've been on the MORNING SHOW since May, 2000. How's that for consistency? Some stations can't last a year with changing their suck-ass DJs, and I've been paired with Evelyn Erives for more than 6 years!
BTW, John in Colton, you owe me $10 for putting EVELYN and PAIR in the same sentence.
Growing up, I also listened to 99.1 KGGI, and I remember Deaner and Daniels, "The Breakfast Club" on the Mornings...so doing the show is a dream come true.
Actually, marrying my wife - ANOTHER Upland Highlander - was a dream come true.
Doing the show is just HELLA cool!
I've also done traffic and news at X 103.9, and a handful of stations in LA and the HD.
Want to more about me? First, here's my precious pooch, Blanca. Check out her webpage - click here!
And here's me with our newest family member, Jax - a black lab mix who we adopted from the San Bernardino Humane Society. His webpage!
And now he's 7 months old and 57 pounds! A far cry from the 16-pounds when we first brought him home (above)
Also, here's my new niece, Kayla Pope, who was born on September 16th. She's being held by my brother Jarrett, who's not so new...
And here's me and my wife with Kayla.
Here's an updated photo taken from May 2008
And here's the BOTH of us screaming for her mama!
The best thing about being an uncle? Someone else changes the diapers!
Ready my Q&A
OLD SCHOOL PHOTO!
1989 - my BFF Eric and I honor our then-favorite beverage, JOLT COLA, which would get us through college - me at Cal State San Bernardino, and he at UC San Diego.
Some of you may be asking, "Where's Evelyn in that photo?" I'm thinking the then 7-year-old was hanging with her parents. |
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Jeff Pope's Links
Check out the 99.1 KGGI HOCKEY TEAM!
Every Sunday at the ICETOWN in Riverside!
Next Game: Sun 7/20 12:45pm
COMICS CORNER
Did you catch D.L. HUGHLEY?
Listen to him rant on Jesse Jackson's misdeeds!  Click Here
He also went off on male porn star Mr. Marcus! Click Here
Or when he jokes about living in Apple Valley and Hesperia! Click Here
Did you hear comedian TOMMY DAVIDSON?
He stopped by, RAPPED and TALKED HOCKEY!Click Here
Did you catch LAST COMIC STANDING's LAVELL CRAWFORD?
He laughed it up with Jeff, 5 Cent and Becky Buckwild!Click Here
How about when KENNY KANE came on the show?
Listen to the laughs when he's introduced! Click Here
From Saturday Night Live, it's NORM MACDONALD!
Dude was COMEDY when he rolled into the studio!
Click Here
Click Here
Did you catch SHERYL UNDERWOOD?
Listen to her reaction at the "white" name Evelyn gave her baby son! Click Here
Listen to her declare her love for George Clooney! Click Here
Wanna hear the greatest VOICE MAIL of ALL-TIME!
Listen to the GANGSTA GRANNIES! Click Here |
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News POPESTER style for August 18 - 22
Thursday 08-21-2008 12:10pm PT
August 21
Large reward offered for dog killers
The Humane Society of San Bernardino is now offering a large reward if you can send two car thieves to jail. This past Saturday, a Hemet couple was visiting the Riverside National Cemetery and brought their 16-year-old dog Rebel. Due to the dog's age, he had trouble walking, so he was left inside the SUV with the engine running and the air conditioning on. A small car slowed, a blonde woman got out, jumped into the SUV, and both vehicles sped away. The abandoned SUV - with all the windows rolls up - was found a short time later in Moreno Valley, and the dog was found dead after succumbing to heat exhaustion.
The story has so outraged people, an anonymous dog lover has donated $10,000 for any indo that leads to the capture and conviction of both suspects.
HIGH DESERT HIJINKS!
Deputies make arrests, count stereotypes
Three people - including a pregnant woman - have been arrested after an investigation into passing bogus checks also uncovered drugs. Authorities looking for the suspects rolled to the Sunset Inn on Mojave Drive in Victorville - not only did they find euipment inside the room used for producing fraudulent checks, they also found - surprise! - METHAMPHETAMINE! Among the losers arrested include Nancy Lopez, a 26-year-old pregnant Victorville woman, 19-year-old Robert Montoya of Apple Valley and Miguel Duran, 29, of Victorville. There's no word on whether Montoya or Duran is the father of Lopez' baby - all we know is, that baby is screwed. And so is the rest of humanity if loser thugs continue to crank out kids.
Oh yeah, EVELYN counted 8 high desert stereotypes in the above story
TROPICAL STORM FAY vs DARWIN
 
Man dies preparing for storm - both want credit
There’s a major argument going on over who’s responsible for the death of a Florida man – Tropical Storm Fay, or DARWIN. You see, the victim prepared for the storm by purchasing two gas generators. While testing them INSIDE his house, he passed out from the fumes and died from carbon monoxide poisoning!
Verdict: DARWIN gets the credit, since someone dying by bringing a gas powered generator into the house is EVOLUTION at work.
Mattel wants HOW MUCH?
Your company Mattel just won a lawsuit against Bratz dolls, in which a Riverside jury ruled, YEAH, THEY STOLE THE CONCEPT OF THE DOLLS FROM YOU. How much should you ask for in damages?
 vs 
Well, a lawyer for Mattel is asking the Riverside jury for TWO BILLION dollars in damages. Just last month, the jury ruled the person who came up with the idea for the Bratz dolls did so while still working for Mattel. OOPS!!
LOSER of the DAY
It takes a lot to take the LOSER title from a pregnant woman in Victorville busted on methamphetamine and check fraud charges. However, I'm giving it to the guy who got his ass kicked and was nearly killed by his wife.
Let's go to Fon Du Lac, Wisconsin, where a woman has been arrested on various charges after she beat up her husband, using a knife and tomatoes. You see, the middle-aged couple got into a fight after HE complained about the drink SHE just made – then things got ugly. The 48-year-old threw her husband to the ground, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him several times. For good measure, she smashed numerous tomatoes in his face.
Add a little vodka and salt, you’ve got a Bloody Hubby!!
Quick memo to guys – if your wife can kick your ass, then YOU need to make the drinks. Oh yeah, and stop drinking Merlot!
OLYMPIC HIGHLIGHTS!
There’s something special about hard-bodied chicks in white bikinis paying beach volleyball in a pouring rain – the way it was MEANT to be played!!
 Props to Misty May and Kerri Walsh for winning the Gold Medal by beating the Chinese for their 108th straight win!
Meanwhile controversy is starting to develop over Michael Phelps, the most decorated American athlete.
After winning 8 gold medals, experts thought he could make more than $100,000,000 on endorsements…his first choice? Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes, which has drawn protests from doctors and nutritionists.
Hey, if they think THAT’s BAD, wait until you hear WHAT ELSE he's ready to endorse!!
Phelps product endorsement #1Click Here
Phelps product endorsement #2 Click Here
Phelps product endorsement #3 Click Here
Morgan Freeman - NASCAR driver?!
Who knew the Academy Award-winning actor was also a NASCAR driver??
Listen to the hilarious 99.1 NASCAR race between Dick Trickle, Kyle Busch and Morgan Freeman!! Click Here
HINT: If you want to win tickets to the Pepsi 500 Sprint Cup race Sunday August 31st, there's a VERY GOOD chance we'll replay this race tomorrow morning. Remember who wins, and be caller #29 Friday morning when we give the cue to call!
KGGI HOCKEY PLAYS FOR THE TITLE!
Jeff and Jesse and the rest of the 99.1 hockey team play for the Silver Division Championship at the ICE TOWN in Riverside!!
Jeff and Jesse with season ticket-holder Promise.
SUNDAY @ 1pm!!
Icetown is located on Magnolia between La Sierra and Tyler in Riverside
August 20
Suspect shot at Dennys near UCR
CHP serves "Lead Lover's Skillet"
An early morning shooting near University and Iowa has sent a man to the hospital and kept part of the University Village closed throughout most of the morning. According to the CHP, officers had pulled over another driver on University when they heard shots coming from the restaurant around 2:10am. As they approached, the suspect allegedly fired at officers - and missed. They then gave the suspect a "Bullets Over My Hammy."
He was taken to the hospital in stable condition.
Local men busted in KIDDIE PORN sting
Do you know these pervs?
Following an 8-month investigation, the feds have charged 55 people across the country for their roles in a child pornagraphy ring. The U.S. Attorney's office say the suspects used a file sharing service to send photos and videos of kiddie porn to one another. Of the 55 pervs arrested, several are IE residents. According to the Daily Bulletin, they are:
Thomas Merdzinski, San Bernardino lawyer. Guess he needs a lawyer.
Evan Stephens, 36, Upland
Robert Young, Jr, 21, Chino
Christopher Halbert, 31, Chino Hills
William Mabry, Upland
Aaron Mason, 19, Fontana
Speaking of kiddie porn . . .
A trail date for a Bloomington man facing kiddie porn charges have been set…so mark your calendars for December 9th . . . and so far, guilt look OVERWHELMING. You may recall the 64-year-old was originally arrested when he tried to cross the border in his car . . . and he had a five-year-old boy sitting in his lap. That AROSE the suspicions of Border Patrol, who checked his car and found a pornographic video involving the boy. Then they went to dude’s home in Bloomington, where they found a room with toys and stuffed animals . . . which is odd for someone with no young children. Oops.
Is that a panty theif under there?
Some folks at an Ontario apartment complex have now begun putting locks on their underwear drawers. That’s after some PERVE has broken into the Casitas Apartments on South Campus Avenue, and has stolen 38 pairs of women’s underwear. Police say dude has also made off with a little bit of jewelry, but mostly he’s making off with panties . . . and I feel totally confident referring to the suspect as a HE, even though I don’t know the gender of the suspect.. Some underwear drawers have been completely cleaned out . . .
IE DUMBASS(ES) of the DAY!
Quick memo: if you're gonna commit a crime, DON'T POST IT ON THE INTERNET!
Three half-witted half-sisters from Riverside visited the slammer after they videotaped themselves beating up another woman, and posted the evidence on Youtube. Police visited the victim last week in the hospital, and she alerted officers the beating was videotaped. Officers surfed Youtube and found the video.
You may be asking, "But how did police know which females did it?" Apparently, one of the suspects threw out some gang signs on the video - gang investigators identified the gang and the area, and needed no time rounding up the stupid beeotches.
But amazingly, those fools have been TRUMPED!
San Jacinto woman commits HAT TRICK of DUMB!
Congrats to Irene Leal of San Jacinto, who scored the trifecta of idiocy!! According to the Press Enterprise, she made numerous stupid decisions that eventually sent her to jail. Here they are, in chronological order:
She let her unlicensed relative drive her car.
Of course, he was pulled over and the car was impounded. Now what is she going to do? She can't go 30 days without her car!
She asked ANOTHER relative for legal advice.
And his advice SUCKED. He told her that if she called police and reported the car as stolen, she wouldn't have to pay an impound fee, AND she'd probably get her car back sooner.
Keep in mind that filing a false police report is a crime, AND she's on probation. She weighed her options, thought about the consequences . . .
One day after her car was impounded, she called police and reported it as stolen.
Once she called police and they took her report, she guaranteed that SOMEONE was going to jail. SHE, for filing the bogus report; or her relative, for driving a "stolen" car. QUE PENDEJA!!
She eventually confessed her misdeed to the police, who prompty arrested her.
State Senate votes to make cars . . . NOISIER?!
With all of our state’s budget troubles solved, it’s nice to see lawmakers are working on more important things – like protecting the blind from electric cars.
Yesterday, the state Senate voted 23-12 and approved a bill that would make electric and hybrid cars NOISIER so they can be heard by blind people. Apparently, some blind people have been hit by these quiet cars while crossing the street. The bill now goes to the Assembly, and if it passes, it'll go to the Governor.
Quick memo to blind people: if you get hit by a car while crossing the street, you need to kick your flea-infested guide dog. That mutt is failing you if you somehow end up UNDER a hybrid.
You know, if there was only some way the driver of a quiet car could alert a blind person that his/her car was approaching....you know, like if there was a button on the steering wheel when pressed, it could make a sound like a HORN.
Lovemaking SIGN of the APOCALYPSE!
Dontcha hat it when a foursome turns violent – and I’m not talking golf!
Let’s go to Wisconsin, where a couple met another couple at a bar, they went back to the first couple’s home, and while all four were having – RELATIONS – the men, while still naked – began fighting.
Or maybe they were fencing.
I can tell you two men and their GFs were engaged in group loving when there was a FALLING OUT.
The two men began arguing, then began pushing – all while still naked. A weapon was pulled out – and THEN someone pulled out a knife.
One of the men suffered lacerations across his face – the other guy was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon. Wow, I’m glad none of my group encounters ever ended like that.
August 19
What are the odds?
STAB VICTIM SPOTS ASSAILANT AT BUS STOP - ONE MONTH LATER!
A month after getting stabbed at a Fontana apartment complex, a victim going to the hospital for treatment spotted the bad guy nearby . . . waiting for a bus!
So before seeing his doctor, the victim called police, and they arrested a 20-year-old man for attempted murder. The victim, who’s a maintenance worker at the apartments, said some dude just rolled up on him and stabbed him a couple of times. He told police then that he’s be able to point out the bad guy if he ever saw him again – well, he got that chance when he went to the SB Community Medical Center and saw the bad guy at a bus stop. The Press Enterprise reports dude confessed to the crime.
Claim filed in Soboba shootout. No, the LAST one.
A lawyer for the family of a Soboba tribal member killed during a shootout with Riverside County sheriff’s deputies has filed a legal claim against the county. In that May shootout - which lasted an hour - deputies shot and killed two tribal members, a 29-year-old woman and a 26-year-old man. A lawyer for the woman claims she was unarmed – deputies say she and the man were armed with semi-automatic weapons. The lawyer also claims she died because of poor training by deputies.
I’m thinking, if the deputies had poor training, wouldn’t they have MISSED with those shots?? And if she wasn’t armed, who the hell was returning fire? The other dead guy? The shootout lasted AN HOUR!
BTW, in an unrelated case, two Soboba members are on trial for attempted murder - yesterday bounty hunters testified they were shot at 21 times trying to arrest the two at a mobile home on the reservation back in 2004.
Again, that case is completely unrelated to the other shooting in May…or the one a week before that led to a Soboba member being killed . . . or the one last December . . .
Swimmer rescued from Riverside sewer
And yes, it IS possible to injure yourself while swimming in a sewer.
Here's a view of someone removing feces from the Santa Ana River in Norco.
Yes, it's a full-time job.
Let’s go to Riverside, where emergency personnel had to be called out to the Santa Ana River under the Van Buren bridge – that’s where a 34-year-old Santa Ana man had to be pulled out of the water. He was swimming in the sewage runoff – uh – I mean IN THE RIVER when friends found him face down. The Press Enterprise reports he suffered some kind of neck injury…
Considering the NO SWIMMING signs, I'm assuming dude's also dealing with a HEAD injury...
OLYMPIC HIGHLIGHTS!
I’m still physically drained from watching the Women’s beach volleyball semi-final last night, as Americans Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh took it to Brazil for their 107th consecutive victory. God was overheard saying, “That match was EXACTLY the reason I invented the bikini.”
WOW. And in High Definition, no less.
My wife was, like, YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT BEACH VOLLEYBALL BEFORE! I responded, ARE YOU QUESTIONING MY PATRIOTISM? And Rodney from Rialto – former writer with the Craig Kilborn Show – is still miffed that a Chinese FETUS won the gold medal in the uneven parallel bars, beating out an American gymnast on a tie-breaker. Hell, just 9 months ago, Chinese’s main news agency - which is run by the government - kept referring to her as a 13 year old.
Did I mention she weighs 73 pounds?
Anyway, Rodney is STILL miffed over the apparent cheating going on . Top 10 Ways to tell that the Chinese gymnasts are under age
10) instead of Gatorade, they're sipping from juice boxes
9) Their babysitters are all in the front row
8) During the opening ceremonies/ parade of nations, they were pushed in baby carriages
7) Their Olympic dorm rooms are decorated in Dora the Explorer
6) In between events, they stay loose by riding their exercise tricycles.
5) After the Olympics, it's back to their jobs at the sweat shops making clothes for their American rivals
4) They are sponsored by Gerber
3) Their equipment bags are filled with toys
2) For each gold medal they are rewarded with tickets to see the Wiggles
and the #1 way you can tell they are under age
1) During the last Olympics in Athens, they watched comfortably from their mother’s wombs.
The PRESIDENT calls the MORNING SHOW
He wanted to discuss the Russia-Georgia skirmish.
After he got off the phone, I'm sure Russia isn't worried about our response.Click Here
Guess who also called the Morning Show?
ICE CUBE!
Check it out! Click Here
August 18
Friday night violence in Fontana
Two shot, one stabbed
Police haven't made any arrests following two incidents where one man was stabbed to death and two people were shot - all within 45 minutes of one another.
Officers tell the Sun they got the first call about a "man down" shortly before 9pm Friday night. They found a man behind a Foothill Boulevard liquor store who had been stabbed numerous times. The victim, a 29-year-old who had been drinking behind the store with about a dozen others, apparently got into an argument with someone, who pulled out a knife and attacked him. He died a short time later.
Around 9:40pm, two teenage brothers and a friend were walking near the Cottonwood Apartments when someone rode his bike to within 100 feet of the trio, and started shooting. A 19-year-old was killed, and his 18-year-old friend was wounded in the back.
Again, no arrests have been made in either case.
Riverside car theives leave dog to die
A Hemet couple is grieving for their dog after the pooch died after being left inside their hot SUV – by the couple who stole the vehicle from a cemetery.
A man and his wife and their 16-year-old dog Rebel had gone to Riverside National Cemetery Saturday…they left the dog in the SUV with the engine running and the air conditioning on. Well, not everybody at the cemetery was there to pay their respects – a car drove up, a woman was dropped off, and she jumped in the SUV and drove off, with the dog inside. Authorities later found the SUV abandoned – with the dog still inside, but he passed away from the heat as the thieves left the windows up. Authorities tell the Press Enterprise they’ve recovered a lot of fingerprints from inside the vehicle, and the suspects could be hit with several felonies.
Did TEXTING on freeway kill Highland teenager?
A San Bernardino County coroner says there's evidence a 16-year-old girl who was killed when she lost control of her car on the 10 freeway in Redlands had been texting right up to the time of the crash. According to the Sun, the teenager suffered massive head injuries when her car slammed into the guardrail around 2:30 am.
While it appears she was texting, the coroner ALSO confirms she was drunk, as she had a BAC level of .15, and was reportedly speeding at the time.
According to various sources, the girl's mom hopes the accident will make other people think before texting and driving . . . while Darwin hopes the accident will make teenagers think before drinking, speeding, texting and driving.
Michael Phelps DOES IT!!
Finishing the greatest Olympics for any single athlete, Michael Phelps won his 8th gold medal Sunday, setting his 7th world record in the process. And the most amazing of those 8 gold medals was the victory in the 100-meter breaststroke, in which he was trailing with ONE METER LEFT WHEN HE WON BY 1/100 OF A SECOND!!
Phelps (left) uses his long fingernails to beat the other guy (right)
Following that amazing victory, he was able to swim the 3rd leg of a final medly to win his record-breaking 8th gold medal, an event so special the Chinese women gymnasts were allowed out of their cribs to watch it live!
Of course the bad news with winning 8 gold medals is, he’s got to pay the extra onboard baggage fee to bring them home.
News POPESTER style for August 11 - 15
Friday 08-15-2008 11:02am PT
August 15
OLYMPIC EDITION
Michael Phelps is STILL the man!!
Michael Phelps goes for a record tying 7th gold medal today, with a shot a record-breaking 8th this weekend, giving him the most for ANY single Olympiad. He’s already won the most gold medals of all-time for ANY athlete.
What is his secret?? Forget those long arms and an upper torso that can double as a runway at LAX . . . perhaps it’s his DIET. While most men need about 2,500 calories a day to get by, Phelps needs 12,000 thousand calories!!
Have you heard his commercial? Click Here
Speaking of Olympics,
HAPPY 30th Birthday to beach vollyball babe Kerri Walsh!
She and her partner Misty May-Traynor (below) haven't lost a match in more than a year and are expected to take the GOLD!
Counting left to right, there are SEVEN boobs in the above photo
WOW! Look at those ASSES!!
Have you heard the Olympic parody song? Click Here
Friday has turned out to be a GOOD day for the American gymnastics team. Days after our women lost the gold medal to the Chinese 12-year-olds – er – WOMEN, Americans took gold and silver in the all-around individual performances.
Nastia Luikin (above) and Shawn Johnson (below left) finishing first and second…
Meanwhile, there are critics who think more than half the Chinese gymnasts are younger than 16 – THAT would be illegal, and one of ‘em – the one’s who’s missing teeth – may be as young as 12. And because of that, they should forfeit the team gold medal to the Americans, who came in second.
 Did you know the average size of these “16-year-old” gymnasts is 4’ 9”, and 77 POUNDS??
 77 pounds!!! And the Chinese government want us to think those girls are 16?? Perhaps this commercial is the secret! Click Here
August 13 - 14
Michael Phelps is the MAN!
Michael Phelps is now the greatest American Olympian of all time – TWO MORE gold medals yesterday in the pool gives him 5 for these games, and 11 all-time, which gives him two more than Carl Lewis and Mark Spitz.
 
Phelps can still win three more gold medals in Beijing, which would give him 8 for these games, beating the 7 that Spitz had in the 1972 games. Medal Count as of this morning: USA 29 China 26
TOUGH BREAK AWARD - I gotta give it to our American women gymnasts, who won the Silver Medal in the team competition, losing to China.
This is WOMEN'S gymnastics, right? So why the hell are HALF the Chinese gymnasts under the age of 16?? (allegedly) Compare the above pixies with OUR women
The controversy is, all Olympic gymnasts must be at least 16, and there are numerous reports that half the Chinese team is 14 and under. Of course, they deny their gymnasts are under age, even though some of them are missing:
1. Boobs
2. Menstrual flows
3. TEETH!
One of the gymnasts smiled, and she was missing TEETH! HOW YOUNG ARE THESE GYMNASTS?! Do their coaches also play the role of the Tooth Fairy??
You know those girls are young when R. Kelly turned OFF his TV when they performed.
And the gold medal in synchronized ASS KICKING goes to the Angels, who have the best record in baseball, and have a 15-game lead in their division!
Riverside County woman charged with . . . WHAT?!
Imagine - a man marries a woman, only to find out another man's name is still on the deed to her naynay!
A 44-year-old woman has pled NOT GUILTY to charges she married a man in Palm Springs . . . while STILL married to a guy in Phoenix. The woman says she THOUGHT she had divorced husband #1. The Press Enterprise reports this could be the first case of bigamy ever tried by Riverside County prosecutors. The woman faces three years in prison - which still isn't as bad as having two husbands.
Ex-boyfriend runs into KARMA
Quick memo – if you’re gonna burglarize your ex-GF’s house, make sure her CURRENT boyfriend isn't there. And if he is, make sure he can’t kick your ass.
That oversight has sent a Chino man to the hospital in critical condition after he got pummeled AND stabbed while burglarizing his ex’s house in San Bernardino. The Press Enterprise reports he and the current BF got into a fight – the ex-BF dropped a vase on the head of the current bpyfriend, who stabbed the ex-BF in the neck. Both went to the hospital, but only the EX was charged with anything: burglary and assault with a deadly weapon.
In other news, a house in San Bernardino had a vase.
Comedian Andy Dick arraigned.
Or not.
Todays scheduled arraignment of comedian Andy Dick - which qualifies as BOTH an oxymoron AND a redundancy - has been postponed.
You’ll recall dude was arrested outside a Murrieta bar and grill for being drunk, fondling a 17-year-old girl and having drugs on him, allegedly.
Anyway, there HAS to be a good reason why his arraignment has been postponed, right? According to the Press Enterprise, it turns out charges haven’t been filed.
Huh? Apparently, prosecutors are "still reviewing the case."
Is that a gun in your pants, or are . . . oh, it IS?
Two High Desert teenagers have been busted for burglarizing a house after ONE of ‘em got caught with a stolen shotgun on a bus.
Let’s go to Victorville, where a home had been burglarized three times previously – the FOURTH time it was hit, a shotgun was stolen. Deputies got enough leads to arrest a 16-year-old boy, who it just so happens was doing – er – DATING the homeowner’s daughter. That’s known as an inside job…THEN he burglarized the place.
Deputies got word that the OTHER burglar, a 19-year-old, was on his way to Sacramento…but apparently he wasn’t sure how to get there, because he was arrested after getting off a bus in Claremont…and yes, he had the stolen shotgun with him.
Yeah, leave it to a 19-year-old dumbass to think the road from Victorville to Sacramento goes through Claremont. Regarding the arrested teenager, Claremont officials were heard GET THAT CRAP OUT OF OUR CITY
Look who's in the news!
Remember that former San Bernardino County sherrif’s deputy who, following a high speed chase, was caught on tape shooting the passenger – even though he told him to get up?
You'll recall he was aquitted on attempted murder charges . . .
. . .uh, he’s filed for bankruptcy.
Hey, that’ll happen when you need to hire a bunch of lawyers because it’s hard to spin something caught on tape – and you’re not working…
Uh oh. It's time for
WHITE TRASH POKER!
Story #1 - Would you like a new definition of hell? Let’s go to St Louis, where a 61-year-old woman’s been busted for allowing six kids, ages 11 to 1, to live in filth amongst 360 animals.
Those animals being dogs, cats, horses, donkeys, pigs, chickens, ducks, goats, pigeons, peafowl, mice, and hamsters…oh yeah, and FISH.
You're probably asking, "Peafowl?"
Story #2-
Wait hold on – that definition of hell has been RAISED! Let’s go to rural Vermont…which is a redundancy…police have arrested a 70-year-old woman and her 41-year-old son, not so much that THEY were living in filth with a carpet made up of feces, urine, and dead things. They were busted for animal cruelty after investigators found dozens of living and dead animals in a home infested with fleas, maggots and rotting carcasses.
Among the LIVING animals were five cats, two ferrets, a lizard, a gecko, a rabbit, a python, a gerbil, a tarantula, a chinchilla, a guinea pig, a tortoise, a mouse and a malnourished dog. Found dead were an iguana, a white rat, a hedgehog and at least 15 cats and kittens in various stages of decomposition. Hell, authorities could even figure out what was decomposing on the stove!
Story #3-
THAT story has been trumped! A husband has been arrested for keeping his wife and four kids prisoners inside their single-wide for three years! Let’s go to Lavonia, Georgia – that’s where a 36-year-old man has been busted for rape, child endangerment and other charges. Police say they were called by the wife who finally escaped the mobile home – they arrested the husband when he showed up for work. She decided to make a break for it after she found out he was having an affair.
Neighbors were shocked to hear that, not only did someone live in what they thought was an abandoned trailer, but that it was a family of six. This is at a trailer park where the mobile homes are only 20 feet apart!!
Of the four kids, the oldest – a 14-year-old – is believed to have spent time in the first grade…and that’s all the schooling they’ve received!
Meaning, they’re MORE than prepared for Southern living.
August 12
Riverside mom convicted in son's death
A Riverside woman has been convicted of murdering her three-year-old son after bashing his head with a door. A jury needed three days to decide the woman’s guilt. Her medically challenged son, who was born 10 weeks premature, was killed when she slammed a door into his head 5 years ago. She testified that YEAH, she was frustrated by his crying, but the door thing was an accident. The most damning evidence in the case was when she discovered the boy had died, she waited hours to call anyone.
She’s looking at 40 years to life.
Man pleads guilty to raping Corona teen -
then she STILL got in the car with him
In a case full of bad decisions, a Lake Elsinore man has admitted to raping a deaf girl who had snuck out of her home and accepted his ride to San Diego to visit friends. This went down in April, when the deaf 16-year-old met the guy at a Corona gas station, and he agreed to give her a ride down to Valley Center so she could hang out with her friends. They got down to Wildomar when he got off the 15, and drove to a dark location, where he raped her. But he was a man of his word, and after the assault, drove her down to Valley Center…and no, I don’t know why she got back in the car with him - espcially AFTER the attack. Dude’s gonna get six years for the plea.
Highland car thieves = MORONS
Quick memo to car thieves – if you don’t want to get caught, you probably don’t want to drive that stolen car past the owner while officers are taking his report.
Let's go to Highland, where a 23-year-old man went to a party over the weekend, got drunk and passed out. When he woke up Sunday morning, he asked himself, "Self, where's my car?"
According to the Sun, dude called police, and while officers were interviewing him Sunday morning – four dumbasses passed by in his car.
Officer Friendly: Can you describe your vehicle?
Stolen car victim: Yeah, there it goes right behind you
Officers chased them down into someone’s driveway – 18-year-old Raymond Jessee of Highland was busted, as were two teens, ages 16 and 15. Police say 23-year-old Sean White got away….
WTF?!
Can you get thrown out of a mall for what you wear?
If you’re shopping in Kentucky, HELL to the YES!
Let’s go to Richmond, Kentucky . . .where the toilet paper has page numbers on it. 20-year-old Kymberly Clem (above) had gone to the local mall wearing a nice, tight outfit befitting a 20-year-old hottie . . . she had only been there for 10 minutes when she tells 99.1 news what happened. Click Here
"people's husbands was looking at me" ???
No honey, those weren't horny men checking you out because of your dress . . . those were officers with the grammar police ready to bust your ass.
August 11
SWIMMING is the BOMB!
Who knew watching SWIMMERS could be so exciting? Michael Phelps (above, left) continues his quest for 8 gold medals, thanks to the fingertip of fellow American Jason Lezak. In dramatic fashion, Lezak - the last swimmer for the American 400-meter-relay team - made up a full body length and caught the French swimmer in the last 100 meters, nipping him in the end by a fingertip!
In fact, NBC commentators had already given the United States the silver medal when they realized a comeback was being made.
Hey, let's not forget LeBron James' slam against China!! 101-70!!
Opening ceremonies? The BOMB!
WOW! How about the visual display of the Opening Ceremonies?? What was most electrifying? Those 2,008 synchronized drummers??
Or how about those cheerleaders who were dancing for more than two hours straight, while 11,000 athletes from more than 200 countries entered the stadium?
BIGGEST LOSER of the OPENING CEREMONIES - it wasn't London, which is hosting the 2012 games and CAN'T hope to match what happened in Beijing.
No, the biggest loser was Raider Fan, who missed the ceremonies so he could watch a meaningless pre-season game against the San Francisco 49ers.
Were drugs/alcohol involved in fatal Corona crash?
Investigators are still waiting for toxicology reports following a crash on the 91 freeway Friday morning that killed four people. All were riding in a car going east around 2:30 in the morning when the CHP says the car, doing about 100, left the freeway, struck and tree, and was pretty much vaporized. The men were between 23 and 18, and were returning from an Anaheim club when they crashed.
Lesbains get a quicky . . . DIVORCE?! Here’s a sign the end is near: A lesbian couple who was one of the first same-sex couples to get married is definitely the first to get divorced. Whuh?
Theresa Ramirez and Adelita Guarjado of Fresno were married on June 27 . . . and three days later, they were filing for divorce…”irreconciliable differences. “ Are you kidding me?
A three day marriage is short, even by heterosexual standards. Using Lesbian terms, this marriage was over, LICKEDY SPLIT!
The only question now is, if 2 women get divorced how will the lawyers make it so they both get everything? Who gets the Melissa Etheridge CDs?? The Lilith Fair souvenirs??
News POPESTER style for August 4 - 8
Friday 08-08-2008 12:16pm PT
August 8
Olympics start TONIGHT
The Opening Ceremonies in Los Angeles, as the Soviets watched from their couches.
Was that REALLY 24 years ago?!
The 2008 Summer Olympics have begun! The opening ceremonies started at 5:08 am our time, which works to 8:08pm Beijing time to coincide with 8-8-08 at 8:08pm. (The number 8 is VERY lucky in Chinese culture) From what I’ve been told, the ceremony featured thousands of fireworks, releasing smoke that's amazingly cleaner than the regular air.
You can catch the ceremony tonight on NBC, and Raider fan is torn! Do I watch Oakland’s third stringers play San Francisco’s bench warmers, or do I watch the Olympians from 200+ countries march into Olympic stadium? Do I watch an event that happens only every four years, or do I blow three hours watching two suck teams play a game that doesn't event count? Popester’s call: Watch the Olympic ceremonies. It would have to be a cold day in hell before someone should watch the Oakland Raiders play the San Francisco 49ers . . . and that’s during the REGULAR season. Why waste a Friday night watching a bunch of guys who, one month from now, will be driving trucks for a living?
MoVal man threatens bank - cellmate makes deposit
Quick memo – if you’re going to threaten to shoot up a bank, you’ll probably be arrested if you show up.
A Moreno Valley man called his bank to argue an overdraft fee, meaning he still writes checks. According to the Press Enterprise, the conversation got heated, and he allegedly told the phone operator he was going to shoot up the bank. Uh oh.
Mo Val police rolled to all four of the bank’s branches in the city – and they found the guy standing outside his car at one of the banks on Frederick and Centerpoint. He was arrested, and was charged a $3 handcuff convenience fee.
His new cellmate has threatened substantial penalties for early withdrawl.
WTF?!
How odd does THAT look? After 16 years of wearing a Green Bay Packer jersey, he's now going to wear a New York Jet jersey?
Obviously, NFL Films is not impressed.Click Here
Speaking of Brett Favre...
Did you hear the impromptu Brett Favre and the Jets parody song this morning? Click Here
August 7
Pre-dawn Riverside raid leads to arrests, oxymorons
How many bit oxymorons can you find in THIS story??
Raids in Riverside and Orange County resulted in the arrests of the leader and half a dozen members of a Christian motorcycle gang after they apparently brawled with the Hell’s Angels. The raids went down as early as 5am yesterday, and by the afternoon 10 members of the Set Free Soldiers – that’s the Christian bike gang – and Hell’s Angels were behind bars. Arrests were made following a massive brawl at a biker bar that resulted in two of the Christian bikers stabbing two of the Hell’s Angels.
And when you’re a member of a Christian biker gang, knives are OBVIOUSLY the weapons of choice, since a NAIL GUN would be totally inappropriate.
Riverside County man busted for having WHAT in his pants?!
Is that a chicken in your pants, or are you . . . oh, it IS a chicken?
A Riverside County man has been arrested after he tried to shoplift some chicken from the store by jamming it down his pants. Let’s to go Palm Springs, where a security guard noticed an unusual bulge emanating from the front of dude’s trousers. The suspect admitted that, yes, he was choking the chicken, and was arrested for shoplifting. He was then taken to jail where his cellmate force-fed him a drumstick. It’s a good thing he gave up without a struggle. Otherwise , he could have been charged with cockfighting.
Dept of Corrections to Soboba parolees: GET OUT!
If you’re a parolee living on the Soboba Indian Reservation, you need to GET OUT! OR, you can choose to stay and be arrested.
 According to the LA Times, the California Department of Corrections has ordered all parolees to leave the reservation, saying the area wasn’t safe for parole officers to enter. This comes after several high profile shootouts between tribal members and sheriff’s deputies, with the deputies going undefeated... also, the tribal chairman has ordered security guards at the entrance to the reservation to stop and question everybody entering the reservation – the Riverside County sheriff threatened to arrest ANYONE who interferes with his deputies. He’s also asked the feds to shut down the casino.
"Tell me you love me, or else!!"
You KNOW you're in love when you're willing to drive off a cliff to hear I LOVE YOU
A Lake Arrowhead romantic has been arrested for being a little too much in love. The 24-year-old man, who’s clearly a lover and not a fighter, was in a car with his 22-year-old GF along Highway 18 up in the mountains…apparently, he was a little bothered that she still had not said I LOVE YOU.
But that’s why he’s a lover!
He desperately wanted to hear those special words - the Sun reports he forced her into the backseat of her car, and threatened to drive off one of the nearby cliffs unless she said.
The GF broke down and said I LOVE YOU before escaping the vehicle and calling police. I'm thinking she really didn't mean it.
Besides, lovers who travel along Highway 18 often have their ups and downs.
DARWIN DENIED . . . AGAIN!
For the second time this week, Darwin has been punked in Orange County.
And when we say DARWIN, we of course refer to Charles Darwin – his main theory on Evolution is varoous species get stronger when the SLOWEST, WEAKEST and MOST STUPID MEMBERS die
For example, that kid who was skateboarding on the ROOF of a high school when he FELL through it? He PUNKED Darwin because he survived the fall.
Well, someone else has survived a bout with Natural Selection – an Orange County man was hiking in the foothills yesterday when he came upon three mountain lion cubs. He stopped to pet them becaue they looked "cute and cuddly."
Wanna take a guess as to WHAT normally hangs out near mountain lion cubs? How about a mountain lion MOM? How about a protective mountain lion mom?
The hiker was lucky as hell that the mom simply swiped at him with a paw before leaving with her cubs…that swipe still caused a gash on the hiker’s arm that needed 27 stitches to close.
I guess Darwin isn't the only one to lose when betting on the Lions.
August 6
Riverside woman killed when drunk's SUV lands on her
An 18-year-old woman out for a late-night walk with her husband and daughter has been killed when an SUV driven by an alleged drunk struck a telephone pole before landing on her. The crash occured Monday night on Magnolia Avenue. The husband and 2-year-old girl were not hurt. The driver ran away, but was arrested 90 mi | |
